Everyone leaves a legacy; what is yours?

Forgiveness #4 - What Forgiveness is NOT

What Forgiveness is NOT:

  • Pardon -A pardon is a legal process where someone else decides to give the wrong-doer freedom.

  • Condoning - Recognizing the wrong-doing but you put up with it (e.g. inappropriate behavior from a boss but don’t do anything about it in order to keep your job)

  • Excusing - Decide the problem is not worth an interaction.

  • Reconciliation - An effort by both parties to reestablish trust and a sense of safety in the relationship.

  • Forgetting - Putting the past behind you.

  • A balancing of the scales - Tit for tat. Even in small ways where we might like to blend in some justice, or adding a pinch of revenge. Example: adding a strong suggestion or a passive-aggressive comment.

  • Erasing accountability. No one can escape that they are responsible for their actions.

  • Saying the words, “I forgive you.” Forgiveness is both a decision and a process that requires more than just words.

©2015 Sally H Falwell, PsyD, PC dba Legacy - Assessment, Counseling and Consulting

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