Forgiveness #4 - What Forgiveness is NOT
What Forgiveness is NOT:
Pardon -A pardon is a legal process where someone else decides to give the wrong-doer freedom.
Condoning - Recognizing the wrong-doing but you put up with it (e.g. inappropriate behavior from a boss but don’t do anything about it in order to keep your job)
Excusing - Decide the problem is not worth an interaction.
Reconciliation - An effort by both parties to reestablish trust and a sense of safety in the relationship.
Forgetting - Putting the past behind you.
A balancing of the scales - Tit for tat. Even in small ways where we might like to blend in some justice, or adding a pinch of revenge. Example: adding a strong suggestion or a passive-aggressive comment.
Erasing accountability. No one can escape that they are responsible for their actions.
Saying the words, “I forgive you.” Forgiveness is both a decision and a process that requires more than just words.